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Kato vs. Mercy Graves
Kato vs. Mercy Graves is a What-If? Death Battle by I'm Lynda. It features Kato from the Green Hornet media franchise, and Mercy Graves from DC Comics. Description This Death Battle! pits two ass-kicking chauffeurs against each other. Two chauffeurs go in, but only one comes out! Interlude Wiz: Where would the rich people be without their chauffeurs? Who would drive them from their stately mansions to their exclusive golf clubs? Boomstick: And, who would kick someone’s ass for them? You wouldn’t expect them to do it themselves, would you? Wiz: In this battle, we bring together two ass-kicking chauffeurs. The first is the Green Hornet’s right-hand man, Hayashi Kato. Boomstick: And the other is Lex Luthor’s Girl Friday, Mercy Graves. Wiz: I’m Wiz, and he’s Boomstick. Boomstick: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle. Kato Wiz: Since the 1930s, there has been a Green Hornet fighting crime on the mean streets of... Boomstick: Well, wherever it is that the Green Hornet fights crime. He didn't like being too specific. Some people thought that it was the Motor City, Detroit, and some thought that it was the Windy City, Chicago. Wiz: Right. And, as long as there has been a Green Hornet, he has had a member of the Kato family to back him up. Boomstick: The first Kato was Ikano Kato, whom Britt Reid the elder rescued in China and took on as a friend, valet and all-around ass-kicker. Wiz: A student of both Bushido, "the way of the warrior," and Shinobido, "the way of the ninja," Ikano Kato was a man of honor, and also a man of incredible martial arts ability. Boomstick: And when Ikano Kato retired, he returned to Japan to raise his family. His number one son, Hayashi Kato, was a dedicated student of all of that Ikano had to teach him. He drank in the concepts of honor and duty, and also the techniques of fighting and invisibility...but mostly fighting. Wiz: And when Britt Reid's nephew, named Britt Reid in the older man's honor, picked up the mantle of the Green Hornet, young Hayashi Kato enthusiastically joined him. Boomstick: And when the Green Hornet needed a door kicked open, or an ass seriously kicked, he turned to Kato. Kato fought gangsters and gunmen and professional killers one at a time, two at a time, and sometimes whole groups at a time. Wiz: And once protection boss Duke Slate recruited tong-leader Low Sing, a kung-fu master and ruthless murderer, as his enforcer. Before long, the Green Hornet engineered a confrontation between Kato and Low Sing. Boomstick: It was an epic fight, with punches and kicks, but when Kato closed in and delivered a series of rapid-fire jabs to Low Sing's solar plexus, it was a definite case of "Boom, boom, out go the lights." Wiz: That's right, Kato is a master of the flying fist, and he is not an opponent to be taken lightly. Mercy Graves Boomstick: Mercy Graves was born into poverty, got a diploma from the School of Hard Knocks, and even got three gold stars from the kindergarten of Getting the Crap Kicked Out of Her. Wiz: And, if there was one thing that Mercy learned from her early life, it was that she needed to be the best fighter around. She honed her body as a lethal weapon, and soon organized the others around her into a gang... her gang. Boomstick: And then one day, fortune smiled on Mercy. She spotted a mega-rich mark with a briefcase, and figured that anything that that rich guy had on him must be worth taking. So, she took it. Wiz: But, this wasn’t your everyday millionaire, Mercy’s target was none other than that great schemer, Lex Luthor. Boomstick: You might expect old Baldy to be pretty ticked off by Mercy’s theft, but you would be all wrong. In fact, Lex was so impressed with Mercy’s abilities that he decided to take her under his wing, and train her to her maximum abilities. Wiz: And now, Mercy Graves is Lex’s right hand woman. He practically doesn’t go anywhere without her, and she handles all his important tasks. She’s his bodyguard, enforcer, and chief problem solver. Boomstick: And, when it comes to kicking buttocks, there are few who can withstand Mercy. One time, when Lex wanted to teach the Joker a lesson, the Joker called out Harley Quinn to protect him. Lex called in Mercy Graves, and the fight was on. Wiz: The two female fighters tore up the room around them, while the men discussed their differences quietly. And when the conversation was over, and Lex was ready to go, he called off Mercy, who at least temporarily had the upper-hand with Harley, and was beating her head on the floor. Boomstick: Sure, Mercy had a pretty noticeable limp after the fight was over, but she showed that she is in fact an expert at the martial arts. Wiz: But, she is not an invincible warrior. Once, when Batman broke into Luthor’s bedroom, Mercy moved in behind him, expecting to get the drop on him. Boomstick: Instead, without even looking over, Batman gave her a backhanded blow, laying her out unconscious with one blow. She’s good, she’s very good, but she’s not perfect. Intermission Wiz: Alright the combatants are set; let’s end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: Its time for a DEATH BATTLE! DEATH BATTLE! Pre-Fight A full moon shone in the inky-black sky, casting wan shadows across the rural Illinois landscape. At the intersection of two country roads, an abandoned farm house looked out silently on the waving stalks of corn. All was silent, save for the distant noises of vehicles speeding along the Interstate. Suddenly, a black limousine with green headlights came barreling down one of the roads, and turned into the house’s driveway. The driver took the car in a graceful arc across the house’s lawn and stopped in front and to the side of the house. It had barely come to a stop when another black limousine charged down the other road. It also turned into the house’s driveway, but it turned the opposite direction, and drew up opposite the other vehicle. The two cars faced each other like crouching lions, ready to spring at each other. The green headlights of the Black Beauty went off, and the Green Hornet and Kato stepped out into the night. Kato was carrying a midnight black briefcase. He turned his back to the other limousine, and held the case out to the Hornet. The Green Hornet opened the case, and made a show of rifling around in its contents. While he worked, his eyes turned up to Kato’s, and he said, “They want this case badly, and will do anything to get it. Are you ready?” Kato's mouth turned up into a discreet smile. “No problem, boss,” he said confidently. The Hornet nodded minutely, and closed and locked the briefcase. Kato placed it into the back of the Black Beauty and closed the door. The headlights of the other limousine clicked off, and Mercy Graves stepped out of driver’s side door and walked to the back door. She opened the door, and Lex Luthor stepped out. He brushed imaginary dust off of his expensive, tailor-made suit and then adjusted his tie. “I want that case, Mercy,” he said. “Please get it for me.” Mercy Graves raised an eyebrow at her employer. “What should I do with the driver when I’m done?” she asked. Luthor looked at her coolly. She could practically see the well-oiled wheels turning in his head. “Put his body in the trunk of his own car,” he declared. “That seems fitting.” The Green Hornet’s voice broke through the quiet, “Are you ready, Luthor? You're the one that called this meeting.” Luthor looked at the man and answered, “By all means, let us begin.” And with that, the two men walked up to the front door of the house, opened the door, and walked inside. Kato leaned back on the hood of the Black Beauty, and crossed his arms, his eyes locked on the woman in the chauffeur’s uniform. Mercy for her part had watched the two men walk into the house, and now she turned and regarded Kato. He wasn’t large and impressive looking, so she decided that he would be an easy opponent to take. She began to walk towards Kato, her hips shifting seductively with each step. She wanted him focused on all the wrong things. Kato watch the approaching woman, and began to size her up. She was trying to distract him, but she wasn’t at all his type. Finally, Mercy reached the Black Beauty, and she rolled her eyes along the vehicle’s lines. “Nice car,” she purred. “So...retro.” Kato had moved to the side, keeping his front towards Mercy. She inwardly sighed. ‘Oh well,’ she though to herself. ‘I guess we’ll have to do this the hard way.’ Suddenly, without warning, she leaped into a high kick, her foot flying right at Kato’s head. FIGHT! Kato spun backwards with the impact. Mercy put her hands on the hood of the Black Beauty, and vaulted into the air. Her leg snapped up, and struck Kato in the face, sending him sprawling into the darkness. She charged after him, but he had rolled with the momentum of the hit, and came up into his fighting stance. He blocked another kick. “Hwaah!” he kiaied. And another. “Hwaah!” He ducked low, under Mercy’s next kick, and rose up. “Hai! Hai! Hai!” he shouted as he delivered three rapid-fire punches to her midsection. Mercy fell back, and looked at her opponent, a snarl spreading across her mouth. Kato’s arms moved in preparation for her next move, his eyes never leaving hers. She bent her knees, and then sprang up into a high kick, striking Kato in the face. He fell back, but Mercy pursued and kicked out again, catching him in the face. Kato staggered back, and Mercy pursued. Her right fist shot out in a back fist, catching Kato and knocking him to the ground. Mercy stood in her fighting stance, and Kato moved jerkily to his feet. He staggered into his fighting stance, and the two combatants faced each other again. A determined look on his face, Kato licked his thumb, and reversed his stance, putting his right hand forward. Mercy made a derisive noise, and then launched a kick at Kato’s head. Kato blocked the kick. “Hwaah.” And then he dropped to the ground, and kicked Mercy’s feet out from under her. “Ha!” The two opponents sprang up, and confronted each other again. Mercy teeth were bared in rage, while Kato’s face registered pure determination. Kato rolled his shoulders, and moved to his left and then his right, his arms in constant motion. Finally, he settled low, his arms parallel to the ground. Mercy kicked out, which Kato blocked. “He!” Then, she launched another kick, which was also blocked. “He!” Kato spun in with his right fist, striking Mercy twice in the stomach, and then once in the face. “Hu! Hwah! Hai!” Mercy fell back, but came around with her left fist, catching Kato in the face, and driving him back and to the ground. She leaped on him before he could recover, and drove his face into the ground. The soft Illinois loam made a poor weapon, and suddenly Mercy realized that Kato had lifted himself up on his arms alone. He lifted his legs up and over, and kicked her in the head, driving her back. “Hwah!” The two combatants squared off again. Mercy realized that she needed to get the upper hand this with opponent, and quickly. She feinted a kick at Kato’s head, and then another. He blocked them with ease, and then Mercy moved in low. She kneed him in the stomach, and then punched him in the face. She grabbed Kato’s head in her left hand, and delivered her most powerful punch to his face. She turned, and dragged Kato, flinging him head-first into the Black Beauty. Kato crumpled to the ground. She moved forward and suddenly Kato kicked out, painfully knocking her left leg out from under her. “Ha!” She recovered as quickly as she could, wincing as she put weight on her left leg. Kato climbed to his feet, and reached behind him. He pulled out a nunchaku, and set it spinning around him. Mercy reached into her jacked, and pulled out a pistol. But, as she brought the weapon up, the nunchaku struck the gun, knocking it out of her hand. “Hya!” Mercy recovered into a kick, catching Kato in the chin, and knocking him back onto the hood of the Black Beauty. Mercy pounced, and began hammering his head into the armored metal of the car. Suddenly, Kato’s arm came around, and struck Mercy in the face, knocking her away from him. He rolled off the hood and onto the ground. Mercy moved forward to take advantage of Kato’s prone position, when suddenly Kato rolled over, showing his face, which now had mask on his mouth. He pressed a button on something in his right hand, and nozzles pushed out of the grill of the car. Green gas shot out, filling the night air. Mercy fell back, but she had inhaled some of the gas. She coughed, and fell back some more, trying to put distance between herself and the gas nozzles. Suddenly, Kato was in front of her. He spun his numchaku, striking her in the left side of the head. “Hai!” She punched out at him, but he merely danced back from her. His numchaku smashed in again striking her in the forehead, forcing her upright. “He-ai!” Mercy grabbed his shoulders, and kneed him in the stomach, and then again. Kato brought his left fist in and punched her twice in the stomach. “Ha! Ha!” Then, he wrapped the numchaku about her neck and turned on his left foot. Mercy was spun around with him so that the two combatants were back to back. “Heyow!” Kato bent at the waste, drawing Mercy off of her feet, and cutting her air off completely. Fighting to keep from panicking, Mercy raised her left hand to her throat, and flailed with her right arm, trying to elbow Kato in the kidneys. But, she could not connect. Mercy thrashed and kicked and flailed with her arms. Slowly her motions got slower and slower. Beneath her, Kato gritted his teeth, and focused on keeping the woman in the air and off balance. Finally she went still. Kato’s face took on a determined look, and he heaved. A sickening crunching noise came from behind him. He released the numchaku, and dropped Mercy’s body to the ground. He staggered back to the Black Beauty, and leaned against it, panting. It had been a hard fight. K.O.! The door of the farm house opened, and the Green Hornet came out, followed by Lex Luthor. The Hornet strolled over to the Black Beauty, where Kato waited with the back door open. Luthor was stunned. The Hornet stepped into the limousine, and Kato shut the door and leaped into the drive’s seat. The powerful engine roared to life, and the car sped out of farm yard and towards the distant expressway. Lex Luthor looked left and right for Mercy Graves, but saw no one. Finally he walked over to the limousine and opened the door. The car was empty. Lex straightened out, and walked back to the trunk He reached his hand out to open the lid, but he instinctively knew what he was going to find. Results Boomstick: That looked...rather…painful. Wiz: Yeah...Anyway, this was an interesting fight. Mercy Graves’ fighting ability was definitely her strength. When shown fighting, she uses almost superhuman leaps to deliver devastating kicks, even when she would be expected to be too far away. Boomstick: Kato is a fast and nimble fighter who is shown to be able to take a beating. Wiz: But, Kato’s real advantage over Mercy was the range of weapons that he has access to. He carries not one, but two nunchakus, and a range of throwing darts. But something else is the array of weapons in the Black Beauty that he can access through a remote control. Boomstick: Mercy on the other hand, is shown to carry a gun, but really nothing else. As such, when it came time to use something beyond her martial arts ability, she was caught short, and paid for it. It was a tough break. Wiz: The winner is Hayashi Kato! Poll How many stars would you rate Kato vs. Mercy Graves? 5 stars 4 stars 3 stars 2 stars 1 star Category:What-If? Death Battles Category:I'm Lynda Category:'Battle of the Genders' themed Death Battles Category:'Hero vs. Villain' themed Death Battles Category:Human vs Human themed DEATH BATTLEs Category:Martial Arts Duel Category:'TV Shows' themed Death Battles Category:Completed What-If? Death Battles Category:What-If? Death Battles completed in 2018